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We at Carnival Cruise Lines didn't forget that a lot of entertainers had promised to leave the country if George W. Bush became President. With that in mind, we have a Special Offer for those who want to keep their promise!
Attention: Would Alec Baldwin, Rosie O'Donnell, Cher, Phil Donahue, David Gephin, Barbara Streisand, Pierre Salinger, and anyone else who made that promise, please report to Florida for the sailing of the Funship Cruise, "Elation", which has been commissioned to take you to your new homes outside of the USA.
The Florida Supreme Court will sponsor a Farewell Parade in your honor through Palm Beach, Broward, and Miami-Dade counties prior to your cruise.
Please pack for an extended stay...at least four years and you should consider the possibility of eight years.
Your captain is - Bill Clinton
Your cruise director - Al Gore
Your recreation director - Monica Lewinsky
Your lifeguard and swimming instruction supervisor -
Sen. Ted Kennedy Sen. Kennedy will also be teaching a course in
emergency procedures. And to really make it an enlightening experience...
Your spiritual advisor and marriage counselor will be
the Rev. Jesse Jackson.
If you've any questions about making arrangements for your homes, friends and loved ones, please direct your comments to:
Senator Hillary Clinton. Her village can raise your children while you're gone, and she can watch over all your money and your furnishings until you return.
Bon Voyage!